[DAVID SAID],“TODAY I AM POWERLESS, EVEN THOUGH ANOINTED KING; THESE MEN, THE SONS OF ZERUIAH, ARE TOO VIOLENT FOR ME. THE LORD PAY BACK THE WHO DOES WICKEDLY ACCORDING TO HIS WICKEDNESS!”
2 Samuel 3:39

Joab’s Role
If you’ve read 2 Samuel, you know that it’s mostly the story of David. In fact, this might be all you remember about it. Therefore, I want to bring out a character that’s hiding in the shadows in almost every story. I say hiding in the shadows because this man is the epitome of shady. His name is Joab.

When David first becomes king, he only becomes king over Judah after he wars with Saul’s son, Ishbaal (or Ishbosheth). Right from the beginning, his general is Joab. Joab and his brothers, Abishai and Asahel, are the sons of Zeruiah, David’s sister, so they are his nephews, and David brings them into military leadership. This is important because David’s blindness to family member’s flaws is his second biggest weakness in leadership (other than stealing his soldier’s wife).

Almost every time Joab is mentioned in a passage, he is doing something sketchy—mostly manipulating David and killing people in cold blood. He is the dark side of the great king. Let’s follow the trail of blood.

Abner
As I mentioned, at first David is only the king of Judah and fights wars with Ishbaal. Ishbaal’s general is a man named Abner, who also was Saul’s head general. When it becomes clear that David is going to win, Abner defects to David. Joab tries to tell David that Abner is untrustworthy, but really he’s mad that Abner killed his brother, Asahel, in battle. In Abner’s defense, Abner pleaded with Asahel not to make Abner kill him, but Asahel left him no choice. So after the defection, Joab pulled Abner aside to have a private conversation, and stabbed him in the stomach. Joab kills him for revenge, but not only that, Abner also stands as a threat to Joab’s high position in David’s army. For David, Abner would have made it easier to bring the Benjaminites and those loyal to Saul onto his side, but Joab ruined that.
David, who was known to have people killed for violating his abnormally high sense of idealism and ethics, did not even demote Joab. Why? I can only speculate nepotism.

Bathsheba
Obviously, this one is David’s fault. David sleeps with one of his soldier’s wives, gets her pregnant, and then has the husband killed in battle. But….who’s there to do the dirty work? Joab. He’s the one who puts Uriah on the frontlines and orders everyone else to abandon him to die. To top it off, Joab uses this to manipulate David. When a messenger sends a report of a battle gone badly, Joab has the messenger also report the death of Uriah to keep David from being mad at him.

Joab is loyal to David, does his dirty work, but he also manipulates David and has zero conscience.

Absalom, part 1
Absalom, David’s son, kills his brother Amnon (for good reason), and then runs away. Joab uses a “wise woman” from Tekoa to manipulate David to bring Absalom back. Joke’s on him though, Absalom comes back, is mad that his dad won’t see him, so he petulantly sets Joab’s field on fire to give him an audience with the king. (I deal with this story at length in a Shuffle Text about Psalm 3, if you want to check it out)

Absalom, part 2
Absalom then takes over the throne, runs his dad out of town, and hires a man named Amasa to be his general instead of Joab. Long story short, Absalom’s guys fight David’s guys and get slaughtered. Why? David had a group of mercenary bodyguards called the Cherethites and the Pelethites, led by Benaiah who could handle just about anybody. (Amasa and Benaiah will come up later). Absalom flees, gets his hair stuck in a tree, and despite David’s expressed request that no one harm Absalom, Joab shoves three spears through him. Why three? No idea. Then, Joab has his men finish Absalom off like a piñata.
There’s a telling scene here where an unnamed soldier stands up to Joab. The soldier tells Joab that Absalom is stuck in the tree (still darkly funny, sorry). Joab asks why the soldier didn’t kill him. The soldier reminds him of David’s request. Joab tells the man that he would have given him 10 pieces of silver. The soldier calls him out and says even if you gave me a thousand pieces of silver I wouldn’t have done it, because you would sell me out to David. This dude is my hero. That’s a bold thing to say to your sketchy but scary general.

Amasa
Remember Amasa? Well, after Absalom is defeated, David brings him back into the army. During another rebellion, David checks Amasa’s loyalty and finds it possibly in question (actually, David didn’t seem to think so). Joab uses this opportunity to take Amasa aside (just like Abner) and stab him, too. Wait, there’s more to the story.  Amasa, is Joab’s cousin, also David’s nephew (well, great-nephew). And when David returned to power he put Amasa in power instead of Joab in order to consolidate all the people that left him for Absalom. This was another power play, and he killed his own flesh and blood to make it.
It gets weirder. He left Amasa dying in the road, and all the soldiers were confused by the sight. So, Joab dragged him into a field and covered him up, nothing to see here. After that, everyone shrugged their shoulders and followed Joab.

Application
Joab was a selfish jerk who justified himself by claiming he was doing what was best for David even when it violated David’s code of ethics and messed up his ability to lead. David, ever the idealist, nevertheless had a weak spot when it came to family (Joab, Amnon, Absalom, Adonijah), so he never fully dealt with Joab.

We are all tempted, like Joab, to sacrifice morals for practicality, especially if it benefits us. We are all tempted, like David, to overlook the flaws of the people we are sentimental towards and let them abuse others around us. And….

There’s always justice. On his deathbed, David tells his son and successor, Solomon, to deal with Joab because of all his sin and probably because he backed Adonijah against Solomon (David’s son and another usurper like Absalom). Solomon sends in Benaiah to deal with Joab, who kills him in the tabernacle because Joab won’t leave. I told you Benaiah would come back up. He’s the one general that Joab never killed. Probably, because Benaiah was known for killing a lion in hand-to-hand combat on a snowy day (see 2 Samuel 23:20, not sure why the weather was important). He was a real warrior instead of schemer.